Father-Son time gets to the heart of the matter

Five boys, five very different spirits.

Yesterday afternoon I had a chance to sit down with each of my boys to discuss life and just talk about whatever has been on their young, impressionable minds. I try to schedule these one-on-one talks with them at least once a month but I kind of dropped the ball six months in a row. I finally got around to scratching it into my calendar and I’m glad that we’re back on track.

Even though I’m with them every evening after school, work, sports and life wind down for the day, it is amazing the thing that you can learn from your kids when you actually take the time to talk without interruption.

For example, No. 5 talked about how happy he was to have his birthday party, to be baptized and how he tries his best to open doors as an act of kindness and service to others. For the most part, he’s a fun-loving, easy-going kid. But get him riled up and you’ll be dealing with “your mama’s drama” of Mariah Carey-esque proportions.

Similar to his brother, No. 4 is a very cheerful, kind and pleasant kid who loves to talk (I think he gets that from Super Mom but I could be wrong). He’s a story teller and you’ll find that he’s very intuitive.

No. 3 is a lesson in futility. He’s as stubborn as gum in your hair and he could care less what you think of him. He’s completely comfortable in his skin and you won’t find a trace of arrogance or guile in him. Our exchanges would hardly be considered a conversation and he rarely discloses any information about himself but that’s okay because the kid makes me laugh and sometimes, that’s all that matters.

Though No. 2 looks a lot like me, he’s smart, nurturing and compassionate, things that I’ve never been accussed of being in all my life. He’s also going to be a huge kid so I’m making sure right now that I’m on his good side in the event that later in life he doesn’t feel the need to pummel me for past indiscretions. He’s an excellent student and a social butterfly. I will have no worries with him when he’s all grown up and on his own. I’m certain of that.

When you have a kid with an actual, valid drivers license, you start to worry about what he does with that newfound freedom. I have very few worries about No. 1 because he’s a straight arrow that often puts me and Super Mom in check. We’ve always said that there is a reason why he was sent to us first. Can you imagine what our household would have been like if No. 5 came first? Par-tay!

My nephew “T” didn’t escape my interrogations either. He’s slowly adjusting to life in a mad house filled with lots of testosterone a blonde field general who takes zero crap from us and a dad who is often there for moral support but is not allowed to talk to any of the friends because that’s a disaster waiting to happen.

Needless to say there were some real eye opening topics especially as they get older. The days of having a tight hold on them are slowly slipping away and me and Super Mom are trying our best to relish the time we have with them now.

3 thoughts on “Father-Son time gets to the heart of the matter

  1. “He’s also going to be a huge kid so I’m making sure right now that I’m on his good side in the event that later in life he doesn’t feel the need to pummel me for past indiscretions. ”
    When I was little, my mom told me, “Don’t pick on your brother! He’s smaller than you now, but that won’t always be the case!” We laughed at the time, but mostly took the lesson to heart . . . fortunately for us, seeing as our brother can now carry two of us at once!

    My own son is only 19 months old, so we’re a little ways from having a two-way conversation. Your closing thought resonates so much with me. Even now, I see how much more quickly time seems to pass by the day. Every day, I delight in seeing my son learn or say something new. Yet a little part is sad, because it means he’s irrevocably a little bit older and a little less the baby I feel I only took home yesterday . . .

    1. Thanks Deborah. Yes, you’re so right. Every moment we spend away from them are moments lost. I’m sure you cherish him. Thanks for visiting!

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