Your comments are discouraged

no comment signThere are people who have good things to say about everything and then there are people who have nothing good to say about anything, everything and anyone. On any given day I confess I fall into the miserable lot that lives in a negative, pessimistic bubble that threatens to transform from seething, bumbling idiot into a full-on enraged maniac intent on burning a path of emotional destruction and burned out psyches in my wake.

Burn me in effigy or burn me in person because that kind of living is wrong.

What’s also wrong is what fails to change in the world of technology – the online parrot, the pariah, the mocker, the bible-thumper, the persecuted, the persecutor, the vigilante, the misguided and so on and so on. I’m talking about your neighbor, your mom, your school teacher, your yoga instructor, your creepy uncle, your armchair quarterback and your backseat driver. I’m talking about the guy who has seen it all and done it all and the girl who has never left her hometown. They are everywhere and right in your home on your desktop, laptop and on your smartphone.

I’m talking about the people the good people who want to be bad on message boards.

You know them as the people who just can’t stand to lose to the guy who has it all. The woman who can’t stand to be second prettiest in her class and the mom who abhors people who use out of the box cake mixes and wins the town bake-off with a knock off. I’m talking about the English majors and professional Facebook editors whose mission in their closeted life to tell people about their bad grammar and spelling errors even though the people they are correcting speak English as their second language.

I’m talking about the guys who find something funny in everything including making light of my friend Brad’s situation who had a serious hunting injury and whose injury turned into a debate about everything from gun control to being a vegan to animal rights and hunters rights and everything else except the poor guy who nearly lost his life. Grow up – your jokes are only funny to you, not to the family members and friends of the guy who was injured.

Muddle through the wasteland that is news and social media and you will find that the majority of these people fall into two very broad categories:

1) The people who have very strong convictions – the strength of their convictions blind them to opposing views and they feel the need to transform your way of thinking to one that is more agreeable with their own.

2) The people who don’t have an opinion but would love to ruin yours, especially if you fall into category #1. Their sole purpose in commenting is to get a reaction…the wrong reaction.

This makes for more awkward, insensitive and infuriating conversation for #1 but leads to absolute inane laughter and impish entertainment for #2.

If you don’t believe me there’s a sure fire way to confirm this hypothesis – open up any random news article. Scroll down to the comments section and read the first four or five comments. I can almost guarantee you that there will be at least one political post and at least one condescending post.

I’m not sure why these trolls find it either important or amusing to share their comments with us. What’s known is that its best to avoid the comments section of your favorite online newspaper, blog even some of your favorite shared Facebook posts altogether. Or you can do what I once did and attempt to talk them down from a ledge, give them parental advice, give them marriage advice or just talk some sense into them. You will lose every time because these people do this for one reason and one reason only – to hear themselves sound smart.

These people have already decided that they are smarter than you, wittier and just plain better than you. No amount of talking will convince them otherwise but talking about it is exactly what they want. So I reiterate – the best way to solve the problem is to fight their ignorance with the one thing that infuriates and perplexes them the most … silence.

Oh and by the way, I would appreciate it if you left a comment on this post.

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